Death and Grief

    I just completed a really interesting class on "Death and Dying: Encountering The Bardos" at Kootenay Shambhala Centre. For our last class we shared stories of our experiences on Death and Grief. I have a very big story on that topic because I was orphaned at a young age.
     When I was nine years old my father died. He was flying a glider as a hobby for many years. This is a plane with a very long wing span and no propeller. A propeller plane is connected to the glider with a very long cable and tows the glider up into the air.  When the glider is high enough to sore the pilot releases the cable and enjoys doing circles soaring through the air like a bird. I used to go with my father on these soaring adventures and it was very dreamy.
    However, on this Friday afternoon a malfunction happened. While he was getting towed the cable released too early. He was not high enough to soar and not low enough to make an adequate landing. He flew through two houses narrowly missing them but impacted on the edge of a curb. The sudden impact caused his death.
    I felt my father die. I remember very clearly writing a math test and intently looking down at my work. All of sudden the wind was knocked out of me. I took a big breath and looked up at the clock. It was 3:55 the same time my dad died.
   Life was very difficult for my mother afterwards. With three kids and a host of other problems she died 2 years later of a heart attack. Oddly, she died on my borther's 9th birthday. I was 11 years old.
    I didn't feel my mother die but I had a premonition that she would die of a heart of attack. In this dream, my father was there, as well as the priest who led his funeral. I saw my mother go up into a large catacomb sort of building. She was having a medical procedure done on her hear and unfortunately the procedure went wrong.
    This is a tragic story. It was a very sad time for me and I am still recovering from abandonment issues. But children are very resilient and live in the present. Life carried on. The dog still needed to be walked, I still went to school and saw my friends. There were many good things to look forward to in the day.
    This is my point in sharing this story. There were gifts that came from this tragedy. For one, I learned my own resilience and built a very strong character. Secondly, I  met Stefano (my husband) when we moved to Vancouver in 1986. Although we lost touch for 20 years after, we created a childhood bond that is still with us today. Thirdly, I am very in touch with the spirit world, which greatly informs my work as an animal communicator.
    Although there are many adversities in life there are also many gifts. The harder we fall the taller we stand back up again. I really believe there is always a silver lining around the dark cloud.